When Love And Fart Collide

Compatriots, after thorough study of this paradoxical subject called Love; I concluded that the only thing that can near it is a fart. Fart, too, is a controversial object. Both of these can be classified into stark genres depending upon the impact they have on the surroundings.

The innards’ complementary work produces the low-pressure pocket of odoured air. The outside pressure being higher, the inner pocket of odoured natural gas whooshes into the atmosphere through a well cutout orifice. Thereby, increasing the temperature of the posterior. Proving the law of conversion energy. The mechanical energy of the gut is converted to heat energy of the fart.
Coming back to sound energy. The decibel level of the fart depends completely upon the pressure gradient. Now, the odour. It can be as mild as the serene smell of the vat nearby or as mighty as that of Kumbhakarna’s unclean loo (this assumption is made based on the amount of edible intake by this colossal hero). Based on the reaction time and nature of a “normal” homo-sapien, it can either cause a slight tremor or persuade someone to scamper out of the room.

Regarding Love, nothing new to be jotted down. Thereby we go straight into the analogies.

The acute low-pressure manifested in the utopian heart with the aid of some do-gooders is the primary definition of love. This low pressure tickles the vocal chords or hand muscles to explicitly proclaim its presence. The absence of orifice is the only noticeable difference. The visceral force during such a proclamation popularly termed as “proposal” is quite similar to that of a fart. Its intensity is relatively lower and the work vector travels in the opposite direction.

The vicinity of the Love-manufacturers result in the emancipation of heat. One fraction of the mechanical energy of the employees is converted to the heat energy and the remaining into sound. Love not only keeps you warm during winter, it also allows expressing the tenacity of your vocal chords. The more “heat”, the better is the quality of Love. We, thus infer that “heat” is a quality control factor of love. Cold Love-workers suffer from delusions. They are not actually in “love”.

Scent of love- What odour is to fart is scent to love. The efforts of two creatures of dissimilar chromosomal content have one huge task. The extent of their post-work scent. If the perfumes are smudged against each other overwhelmingly, then their love is pure. This is the purity control factor.

The more the pungency of fart, the better is the condition of the viscera. Similarly, when the male smells completely of the female, the quality of love is optimum. That’s what is hypothetical, in terms of science – ideal. Recent developments in this field may speak differently. Owing to the lack of substantial evidences, its still hypothetical.

P.S : This comparative study is purely based on “normal” facts. Any unintended exaggeration should be pardoned.